100 Funny Quotes Laughing So Hard

Funny Quotes Laughing So Hard A day without laughter is a day wasted. — Charlie Chaplin’s “Laughter heals all wounds, and that’s one thing that everybody shares. No matter what you’re going through, it makes you forget about your problems. I think the world should keep laughing.”

So to keep you healthy and happy literally, enjoy these 67 funny quotes “If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.” Laugh Quotes and Laughing Quotes. [Humanity] has unquestionably one really effective weapon—laughter. A good laugh heals a lot of hurts. — A good laugh is a mighty good thing, a rather too scarce good thing. — A good laugh is sunshine in the house. — A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.

Top Funniest quotes with pics and memes lighten up, just enjoy life, smile more, laugh more, and don’t get so worked up about things. So I want to be an example that you can be funny and be kind and make people laugh without hurting somebody else’s feelings. Life is hard.

Funny Quotes Laughing So Hard

Funny for the year I’ve had! Just have to turn yourself around!

1. “Farting is like the
song from Frozen. Work: Conceal,
don’t feel, don’t let them
know… At home: Let it
go! Let it go! Can’t
hold it back anymore…”

2. “Hurt me and you’re
going to feel pain. Hurt
my best friend and you’re
going to need an ambulance.
Hurt my family.. I’m going
to need a shovel.”

3. “Each time a bird
shits on my car, I
eat a plate of scrambled
eggs on my porch –
just to show them what
I am capable of.”

4. “Sorry, your password must
contain a capital letter, two
numbers, a symbol, an inspiring
message, a spell, a gang
sign, a hieroglyph and the
blood of a virgin”

5. “I choked on a
carrot this afternoon and all
I could think was “I
bet a donut wouldn’t have
done this to me.”

Funny Quotes Laughing So Hard and Hilarious Memes

6. “Life is to short
to be serious all the
time. If you can’t laugh
at yourself, call me, I’ll
laugh at you.”

7. “When you ask your
kid to smile for a
picture.”

8. “Time traveler: What are
you doing? Me: Getting ready
to run into area 51
Time traveler: Oh, the area
51 massacre is this year?
Me: The what.”

9. “An apple a day
keeps anyone away if you
throw It hard enough.”

10. “Throw a spider at
the one in the middle
and let the fun begin.”

11. “Based on how I
react When toast pops out
of the toaster, I will
never look cool walking away
from an explosion.”

12. “I was addicted to
the hokey pokey but I
turned myself around.”

13. “Decaf coffee? You mean
brown sadness water?”

14. “I know a good
company when I see one.”

15. “One of the best
feelings in the world is
knowing that someone is happy
because of you.”

16. “I was in a
public toilet and had just
sat down, when I heard
a voice from the next
cubicle, he said “Hi!, how
are you?” Embarrassed, I said,
“I’m doing fine”. The voice
said “So what are you
up to?”. I said, “Just
doing the same as you,
sitting here!”. He said, “Can
I come over?”. Annoyed, I
said, “rather busy right now”.
The voice said, “Listen, I
will have to call you
back, there’s an idiot next
door answering all my questions.””

17. “Did a cartwheel the
other day, thinking it was
lke riding a bike. It’s
not.”

18. “No I don’t need
anger management you need to
stop pissing me off!”

19. “Roses are red, violets
are blue a face like
yours belongs in a zoo.
Don’t you worry I’ll be
there too, not in the
cage but laughing at you!”

20. “The biggest lie I
tell myself is, “I don’t
need to write that down,
I’ll remember it”.”

21. “Sweet jesus please let
me live I promise never
to eat taco bell ever
again.”

22. “I fold fitted sheets
exactly how I’d fight off
a boa constrictor.”

23. “I don’t sugar coat
shit, I’m not willy wonka.”

24. “Ho made apple butter
bitch did what?”

25. “Experience means you did
a lot of things wrong.”

26. “I’m sorry for what
I said before I had
my coffee.”

27. “I’m going to try
and act like a normal,
happy and mentally stable person.
Wish me luck!”

28. “I really do try
to see the best in
people. But seriously.. Some of
you fuckers are making it
so damn hard.”

29. “The best revenge is
massive success.”

30. “When your play style
in fighting games is just
“wouldn’t it be funny if
this landed” and it lands.”

31. “They say opposites attract.
I hope you meet someone
who is good- looking, intelligent,
and cultured.”

32. “Our greatest glory is
not in never falling, but
in rising every time we
fall.”

33. “In my defense, I
was left unsupervised.”

34. “I don’t always learn
my lesson, but when I
do you can bet I
learned it the hard way.”

35. “DEJA POO: The feeling
that you’ve heard this crap
before.”

36. “My momma didn’t raise
a fool. A fucking psycho
maybe, but no fool.”

37. “Do you ever meet
someone for the first time
and want to buy them
a toaster for their bathtub?”

38. “I’m just one step
away from being rich, all
I need now is money.”

39. “This woman was sleeping
in snake printed pajamas and
her one foot was outside
the blanket. Well her husband
thought it was snake and
he broke her foot.”

40. “Rabbits jump and they
live for 8 years. Dogs
run and they live for
15 years. Turtles do nothing
and live for 150 years.
Lesson Learned.”

41. “If you’re happy and
you know it thank your
EX(clap, clap).”

42. “I never dreamed I’d
grow up to be an
asshole but here I am
killin’it.”

43. “Apparently “spite” is not
an appropriate answer to “what
motivates you?”

44. “You just realized… Duck,
duck, goose is the only
game where you can hit
people on the head and
run away laughing.”

45. “If life gives you
lemons, you should make lemonade
and try to find somebody
whose life has given them
vodka, and have a party.”

46. “I don’t hate you,
I’m just not necessarily excited
about your existence.”

47. “Too old for snapchat,
too young for life alert.”

48. “Life is short. Smile
while you still have teeth.”

49. “It’s okay if you
fall apart sometimes. Tacos fall
apart and we still love
them.”

50. “If I offended you,
cry me a river. I’ll
bring snacks and a raft.
I will literally float down
your tears eating chips and
working on my tan.”

51. “Alexa, clean the house.”

52. “Askhole – A person
who constantly asks for your
advice, yet always does the
opposite of what you told
them.”

53. “If the rock runs
for president in 2020 there’s
only one thing that can
defeat him.”

54. “You’re about as pleasant
as an itchy butthole….”

55. “Listen, I still want
to be invited but I’m
not coming.”

56. “The best thing about
me… I’m a limited edition,
there are no copies. And
I bet right now you
are thinking ‘thank God’.”

57. “In life, it’s important
to know when to stop
arguing with people and simply
let them be wrong.”

58. “Queens don’t compete with
Hoes.”

59. “Stop crying about being
a doormat and get the
fuck off the floor.”

60. “I’m here to kick-ass
and drink whiskey. And pilgrim,
I’m all out of whiskey.”

61. “Sorry boss… You can
either expect me to work
well with others or pass
a drug test. It can’t
be both.”

62. “So it turns out
that being an adult is
mostly just googling how to
do stuff.”

63. “To live is to
suffer, to survive is to
find some meaning in the
suffering.”

64. “My playlist when it
goes on shuffle.”

65. “The world is not
filled with assholes but they
are strategically placed so that
you run across one every
day. Every. Fucking. Day.”

66. “Sometimes we expect too
much from others because we
would be willing to do
that much for them.”

67. “Instead of a sign
that says: “Do not disturb”
I need one that says:
“Already disturbed proceed with caution”.”

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