Funny Quotes to Make You Laugh Out Loud – Need a good laugh? Check out these 60 funny quotes to help you get through today. These funny quotes will seriously make you laugh out loud!
Funny Quotes that are short and easy to remember! Cool Quotes “The challenge is to stay cool enough to handle the pressure at the moment so that you can succeed in the future.”
These are the Most Hilarious Short Quotes You’ll Ever Read – Hilarious short quotes certainly do the trick; they are short, sweet, and rather amusing, and are likely to tickle your funny bone.
Funny Quotes Amusing Sayings and Quotations
Amusing Funny Quotes
Short Funny Quotes That Pack a Punch of Laughter Looking for a quick laugh at the end of a stressful day? A few short but funny quotes will definitely tickle your funny bone and beat away your saddest.
1. “Nothing makes a person more productive than the last minute.”
32. “I need to get in shape. If I were murdered right now, my chalk outline would be a circle.”
33. “Coffee is a gift to myself. It says, “Here’s something to make your day a little better. Please don’t get arrested.”
34. “My mind is like my internet browser 19 tabs open 3 of them are frozen & I have no idea where the music is coming from”
35. “Brain: Do you have your wallet? Me: slaps my ass so hard everyone in the target can hear it Me: Yeah Brain: Do you have your wallet and your phone and your keys and your pocket knife and y- Me: playing my ass and thighs like a bongo set at this point”
36. “The world is not full of assholes, but they are strategically placed so that you’ll come across one every day. Every. Fucking. Day.”
37. “Dear Santa this year please give me a big fat bank account and a slim body please don’t mix those two up like you did last year thanks”
38. “Me: I don’t wanna go to work Bills: bitch better have my money”
39. “With great responsibility comes great need to take a nap.”
40. “different language pls check it”
41. “I didnt fall for you, you fucking tripped me”
42. “I have decided to cut back on being sarcastic. I solemnly swear to only be sarcastic on days that begin with T like… Tuesday, Thursday, Today, & Tomorrow.”
43. “A guy in the store on his cell said “Susan, I’m in my car on my way” so I yelled “No he’s not!” because nobody lies to Susan in front of me.”
44. “Funny how drinking 8 cups of water a day seems like it’s impossible but 8 beers and 6 shots in 3 hours go down like a fat kid on a see-saw…”
54. “I really do try to see the best in people. But seriously.. some of you fuckers are making it so hard.”
55. “For today * Drink your coffee * Stay focused and positive * Don’t freak out * Remember, stabbing people is wrong! * Are you wearing pants?”
56. “…I wish I could invoice people for wasting my time”
57. “I shine a laser pointer in my neighbor’s window when they’re gone. Their cat has trashed 3 sets of mini-blinds chasing it. They have no idea it’s me. Am I evil? Yes, I am.”
58. “singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth, then it just becomes a soap opera.”
59. “Ate salad for dinner! Mostly croutons & tomatoes. Really just one big, round crouton covered with tomato sauce. And cheese. Fine, it was pizza. I ate a pizza.”
60. “It’s probably my age that tricks people into thinking I’m an adult”
Strap yourselves in tight because the best funny pictures of today’s Internet are gonna be quite the ride. This kid in the first hilarious photo knows exactly what I’m talking about. 60 Funny Pictures That Will Make Your Day. So you’ve hit the end of today’s funniest pictures and you’re feeling kinda down? Looking for the best funny quotes pictures, photos & images? FunZumo’s pictures can be used on Facebook, Tumblr, Pinterest, Twitter and other websites.