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75 Funny Valentine’s Day Messages – Valentine Card Images

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Funny Valentine’s Day Messages: Your presence – The day will be more meaningful if you managed to meet your lovers to celebrate the day—not merely gifting him/her. The message that is tagged along – It is not a Roman tradition, though, but providing your gift with a lovely Valentine’s Day text will help to make your gift stands out.

But what if your girlfriend/boyfriend dislikes something too romantic for Valentine’s Day? Chill out, you can browse for some fun Valentine’s day quotes easily on the internet. Writing a Valentine’s Day message to your lover or partner is no big deal.

Now that you may extend the list of gift recipients on this day of love, it is a challenge to write multiple messages to your other loved ones, say your family members or friends. And it is also awkward to give pre-printed cards with the same Valentine’s Day messages, isn’t it?

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funny valentine wishes card sayings

So, in this article, we collected 85 best Valentine’s Day messages that surely give you some inspiration. Whether you are looking for words to say to your significant other, your family, or your friends this February 14th, we’ve got your back.

Funny Valentine Day Messages

1. Valentine’s Day is when a lot of married men are reminded what a poor shot Cupid is. – Unknown

2. It’s called Valentine’s Day, you moron. If you’re going to date a human, Dankmar, you need to remember their holidays. – Abbi Glines

3. I love you no matter what you do, but do you have to do so much of it? – Jean Illsley Clarke

4. It’s undeniable that for some, composing funny Valentine quotes may be difficult. That is because it’s quite uncommon for people to put romance side by side with humor. But still, nothing is impossible. Finding a reference where you can grab some funny Valentine’s sayings can be done easily by going online.

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funny valentine quotes for wife and husband

5. The best way to spend this valentine’s day for me is to spend it with the love of my life – food. Wishing happy valentines day to you!

6. I have never seen anyone more romantic and caring as a person than you are. Maybe this is the reason why you are still single!

7. You complete me, and that is not what most can do, I hope you enjoy the time as I will be watching you from afar for you don’t know me but I know you well. Happy valentine my crush.

8. It feels so sad to know that you don’t have any special person to spend Valentine’s day with. You better spend the day with me, and better luck next year!

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funny valentine quotes for gf and bf

9. The brain is the most outstanding organ. It works 24/7, 365 from birth until you fall in love.

Funny Valentine’s Day Messages for Friends

11. I love being married. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. —Rita Rudner

12. I think you are suffering from a lack of Vitamin ME. —Anonymous

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funny valentine messages for her with pictures

13. If you were on paper, you’d be what they call fine print. —Anonymous

Read:   60 Happy Friday Funny Memes Day of the Week

14. On a scale of one to ten, I’d give you a nine — and I’m the one you need. —Anonymous

15. Love is a game that two can play and both win. —Eva Gabor

16. Love is just like a fart. If you push it, it will be crap. Happy valentine’s day, my friend!

17. Whatever you do, don’t commit yourself. You’ll be dead long before your death. Happy valentine’s day!

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funny valentine day messages for friends

18. I just found out that I have fallen in love more deeply than I had originally planned. You can take this as a valentine’s day confession from me!

19. You are an essential nutrient of my body. Without you, I would suffer from osteoporosis. Happy Valentine’s day, my love of life.

Funny Valentine Messages For Him

21. Here are some romantic and sweet messages to write on Valentine’s card for your boyfriend and your husband who is your best friend all along.

22. You are my moon, and I’m your sunshine whenever you shine, I become brighter. So keep shining on me, my LOVE.

23. I love you more than my washroom slipper.

24. You’re the glaze to my donut, the sweet to my heart! Love you, Valentine!

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cute funny valentine messages for friends

25. You don’t steal my heart, you just hacked my brain. I even forgot my name when I am with you. Happy Valentine Day, my sweet baby.

26. I solemnly swear I am up to no good. Especially when I’m all alone with you!

27. I don’t usually hang out on valentine’s day, but when I do, I make sure It’s with someone so gorgeous as you!

Funny Valentine Messages For Her

29. As said earlier, you can just lounge lazily on your sofa and scroll the internet for some hilarious Valentine’s day texts. Now when you have found some, what to do with it?

30. Well, you can easily put it into some media like a gift card, text (SMS/chats), or maybe spreading the word through your social media. The last option is very unlikely, though, but it’s still possible to put the word as your status. Who knows your friend will laugh over the funny texts?

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best funny valentines day messages for friends

31. When people ask me what the best thing about you is, I say nothing. I don’t want them to fall in love with you. Happy valentine’s Day!

32. Even God couldn’t find someone for you in all these years. Maybe she is not born yet, or maybe she is from mars! Happy Valentine’s Day!

33. They say life is a race, run at your own pace, but I couldn’t even walk without you in this race. You’ve become my legs and my everything. Happy Valentine’s Day my love.

34. Happy Valentine’s Day. Here is the list of things you should buy me because you are the best boyfriend in the entire world.

35. I don’t need a lot of candies this valentine’s day because I’m on a diet. You can buy me diamonds instead!

Funny Valentine Wishes for Singles

37. If you feel lonely today, just remind yourself that yesterday you felt the same as today, and tomorrow will not be different either. Happy valentine’s day!

Read:   60 Funny Quotes Amusing Sayings and Quotations

38. Love is like a blanket. It will keep you warm and safe for some time but very soon you’ll realize that it was an electric blanket and someone else is in control of the switch!

39. It’s always a wonder how the least intelligent guy in the friend circle gets the most beautiful girl in the class. Happy Valentine’s Day!

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sweet funny valentine messages for him with images

40. Never forget how we looked like now, someday we will be old and wrinkly, but the best part about it is we will be old and wrinkly together. Happy Valentine’s my love!

41. Before I met you, I was living my life as nothing else matters to me than friends, but now I’m living like nothing else matters than you. I’ve neglected my friends. Happy Valentine’s Day cutie.

42. I am not saying that I care about money more than I do about you. But it’s my father’s advice to spend my money for good purposes only! Happy Valentine’s Day!

Funny Valentines Day Text

44. Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop. – H. L. Mencken

45. Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love. — By Albert Einstein

46. If you were a transformer you’d be Optimus Fine. —Anonymous

47. All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt. —Charles M. Schulz

Funny Valentines Day Quotes

49. “Love does not consist of gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction.” – Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

50. “When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.” – Nora Ephron

51. I wish I could strip your clothes off tonight like the way you strip a bar of wrapped chocolate. I wish I was with you tonight. Happy valentine’s day sweetheart!

52. I wish you a very Happy Valentine’s… With all my huggy heart!

53. Sending you a big Valentine hug! My sweet teddy bear, you always give me the warmth and comfort I need at night. My sweet pillow, Happy Valentine’s Day!

54. My healthcare plan does not cover the broken heart. So please don’t leave me ever. Happy valentine’s day!

55. I guess you didn’t steal my heart; you completely grabbed me from me! Happy Valentine’s day.

Funny Valentine Quotes for GF and BF

57. Happy Valentine’s day my love and my everything, I want you to know that life is short, so let’s love each other forever, even if it’s difficult. Enjoy this day with me.

58. Sending you 100% natural, organic love, Valentine! Locally-sourced hugs and kisses to follow.

59. I love you so much, I could steal the moon for you, but for now, here I stole chocolates. Happy Valentine’s Day.

60. Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.

61. I called the police to get you arrested. Your crime is stealing my heart and taking my breath away. Happy Valentine’s Day.

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62. I always try to put my best foot forward to resolve all the issues prevailing between us. But all go in vain. Because you are so silly and dumb. Happy valentine’s day, anyways.

Funny Valentine Quotes For Wife and Husband

64. For My Sweet Daughter Happy Valentine’s Day! You have the most courageous heart and loving spirit of anyone I know. I am so lucky to be your mom-you make my heart overflow with love.

65. You are my Valentine’s day crush; it’s cute to spend special moments such as today with one’s grandpa. Therefore, I choose to be with you today.

66. Here’s Valentine’s Day filled with good wine, good food, and especially good friends like you.

67. Be my Boo. Or I’ll be Boo-Hoo! Be mine, Valentine?

68. Love is blind so true. How mad I am how can I fall in love with you. Never mind! Happy Valentine.

69. I don’t mind being a security guard while you’re dating as long as you’re paying for me being drunk & grabbing some hookers from the club.

70. If you can’t buy happiness with money, try buying a valentine’s gift for me. It will work like magic. I can guarantee you that!

71. Our love is like a car with no brakes, it’s simply unstoppable. I will love you till the gas gives out. Have a fantastic valentine, my love, you are loved!

Best Funny Valentine’s Day Images With Quotes

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There is no one I have ever met who is more romantic and loving in their personal life than you. Perhaps this is the explanation for your continued single status?

You complete me, which is something that not many people can do. I hope you have a good time because I will be watching you from a distance since you don’t know me, but I know you very well. My crush wishes you a happy Valentine’s Day.

Realizing that you will not be spending Valentine’s Day with a particular someone makes you feel depressed. You’d better spend the day with me, and best of luck to you in the upcoming year!

The brain is the most remarkable of all the organs. When you are born, till you fall in love, it operates around the clock, 365 days a year.

A fart is a fart, and love is a fart. If you push it, it will turn out to be a disaster. My buddy, have a wonderful Valentine’s Day!

Whatever you do, don’t commit to anything. You’ll be dead a long time before you die. Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone!

I’ve just discovered that I’ve fallen in love with someone more profoundly than I had first anticipated. I’d like you to consider this a Valentine’s Day confession from me!

Valentine’s Day card ideas for the 14th of February: messages to put on them

You are a vital component of my body’s nutrition. I would be suffering from osteoporosis if it weren’t for you. Happy Valentine’s Day to you, my true love.

I adore you more than my bathroom slipper could ever imagine.

You’re the icing on my doughnut and the sugar on my cake! Valentine, I’m in love with you!

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You didn’t steal my heart; instead, you hacked into my head. When I’m with you, I even forget what my name is. Happy Valentine’s Day to you, my precious child.

I honestly vow that I am not up to anything bad. This is especially true when I’m alone with you!

Even though I don’t generally go out on Valentine’s Day, when I do, I make sure it’s with someone as beautiful as you!

Even God couldn’t find you a suitable partner after all these years. Maybe she hasn’t been born yet, or maybe she’s from the planet Mars! Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone!

Some people say that life is a race and that you should go at your own pace, but I couldn’t even walk if you weren’t alongside me in this race. You’ve taken on the role of my legs and everything. My sweetheart, I wish you a happy Valentine’s Day.

Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone. Here is a list of items that you should get me as a thank you for being the best boyfriend on the face of the planet.

Because I’m on a diet, I don’t require a large amount of candy for Valentine’s Day. You could instead spend your money on diamonds for me!

Don’t forget how we looked today; one day we will be old and wrinkled, but the nicest thing about it is that we will be old and wrinkled in the same place at the same time. Happy Valentine’s Day, my sweetheart!

Before meeting you, I lived my life as if nothing else mattered to me except my friends; now, I live my life as if nothing else matters except you. I’ve been neglecting my social circle. Happy Valentine’s Day to you, sweetheart.

I’m not implying that money is more important to me than you or your well-being. However, my father recommends that I only spend my money on worthwhile endeavors! Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone!

I hope I can take your clothes off tonight in the same manner as you would take a bar of wrapped chocolate off its wrapper. I sincerely wish I could have been there with you tonight. Have a wonderful Valentine’s Day, sweetheart!

I want to wish you a very happy Valentine’s Day with all of my heartfelt wishes!

I’m sending you a huge Valentine’s Day hug! My lovely teddy bear, you are always there for me at night, providing the warmth and comfort I require. Happy Valentine’s Day to you, my darling pillow!

My medical insurance does not cover the cost of a broken heart. So please don’t ever leave me alone again. Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone!

I think you didn’t only take my heart; you fully enslaved me and took me away from myself! Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone.

Hello, my love and everything in my life. I want you to know that life is short, so let’s love each other for the rest of our lives, no matter how difficult it may be. Take advantage of this wonderful day with me.

Let us celebrate Valentine’s Day with excellent wine, nice food, and, most importantly, with wonderful friends like you.

Make yourself available to me. Otherwise, I’ll be a boo-hoo! Would you like to be my Valentine?

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Love is blind, and this is very true. I can’t believe I’m falling in love with you despite how furious I am. Never mind, I’m done with it! Wishing you a happy Valentine’s Day.

Keeping one’s commitment to one person on Valentine’s Day is one day, and the rest of the days are for other people.

Hopefully, God will fill your heart with love and your wallet with money so that you may treat your honey to some chocolates! Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone!

I was alone and depressed at the time. And then I met you, and I understood that being single wasn’t all that horrible after all. I’m not serious! My sweetheart, I wish you a happy Valentine’s Day!

I’m madly in love with you. But, what’s your name, exactly? LOL. Baby, have a wonderful Valentine’s Day.

I wasn’t kissing her; instead, I was talking in her ear.

Your ability to gnaw on my thinking like a bar of chocolate is appealing to me. It will only be a matter of days before I am rendered completely unable to function due to your affection!

Celebrating Valentine’s Day appears to be a lot of fun in movies. However, in real life, it is both unpleasant and expensive. Try purchasing a bunch of flowers and you’ll see what I mean!

From your kissy face, I wish my huggy bear a very happy Valentine’s Day. I adore you!

You are my favorite meal, and I look forward to eating you daily. I wish you the most romantic day possible. Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone.

There are only a few things in life that I look forward to ripping their clothes off when I am married, and one of those things is you. I adore you so much, dear. Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone.

Congratulations on your engagement, my darling love. I’m delighted you were able to finally love me; now I may die in peace and I hope we die together. But first and foremost, let us enjoy today.

Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone. I’m hoping that on Valentine’s Day you’ll refrain from getting on my nerves.

Chocolates aren’t going to be enough to satisfy your insatiable appetite, so I’ll buy you dinner instead. I’m hoping you’ll agree to accompany me on Valentine’s date.

Valentine’s Day meant absolutely nothing to me before you, and it continues to mean absolutely nothing to me now. But I still care for you.

The primary responsibility of a guy is to safeguard his wife from her need to “get bangs” every other month.

Every day, I adore you a bit more than a s’more. Valentine, you are the epitome of lip-smacking goodness!

All that is required is love. However, a little chocolate now and again isn’t going to hurt.

I adore you in the same way that I adore soft drinks. Wishing you a happy Valentine’s Day.

You are my wife, my commander-in-chief, and, on occasion, my mother. You are my everything. You terrify me, but in the best manner, a terrified person could be terrified. Congratulations to my lovely wife on Valentine’s Day!

You may not have someone to fall in love with, but at the very least, your wallet is safe and sound. Take pleasure in your existence, man! I’ve already begun to be envious of you!

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If love is a foolish emotion, then I must be a fool, a fool who has fallen in love with the most beautiful lady in the world, in my opinion! Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone!

Increase the magnification. Hold it there. Continue to hold… continue to hold… Forever is lovely.

Every Valentine’s Day, a hole in my pocket is created, and it takes me the entire year to patch it up. I’m relieved to hear that you’re still single!

Truly loving and supportive friends are the best Valentines a person can have.

Valentine’s Day is a notion that I am familiar with. You fall in love with the nude infant when she shoots you with an arrow.

Your occupations are robber and drug dealer all at the same time. Because you have not only stolen my heart, but you have also made me dependent on you. My beloved hubby, I wish you a very happy Valentine’s Day.

While some people believe that love is blind, I do not believe this to be true. Your love has opened my eyes to all of your flaws, and yet I still love you. My sweetheart, I wish you a happy Valentine’s Day.

You know that tingling sensation you get when you’re in a relationship with someone? That is the sound of your common sense escaping from your body.

My entire universe revolves around you. When I’m with you, I even forget about the zoo altogether. I’d like to wish you a very happy Valentine’s Day, my darling.

As of right now, I’m having a fantastic time with my girlfriend; I just wanted to know how you’ve been getting along today. What is it like to feel like you’re dating yourself? I can’t wait to find out!

Words fail me when it comes to expressing my feelings for you. Maybe it’s just my dumb face. Greetings and best wishes on this Valentine’s Day.

If my fortune increased at the same rate as my feelings for you today, I’d be on the Forbes list of the world’s wealthiest men. Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone!

You’re even more wonderful than iced tea and Moon Pies together! Babe, I adore you!

In addition, I’m unmarried for the first time this year.

I enjoy it when people inquire about my plans for Valentine’s Day, as though they are unaware that I am single.

Which would I prefer: to be feared or loved? Easy. both. Because of how much they adore me, I want others to be terrified of how much they adore me.

Who said Valentine’s Day was exclusively for lovers? Who said that? My best buddy, you have my heartfelt affection! Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone.

Why does being in love with you have to be so toxically beautiful? I pray every day that you will see me, and today, I will stand directly in front of you so that you will not miss me, your valentine.

Happy Valentine’s Day, and may it make you wag your tail in excitement. If you were to have one,

Are you a book from the library, young lady? Because I can’t seem to get enough of looking for you! For me, loving you is a strange and unpredictable experience that takes me on a roller coaster trip. Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone!

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It is necessary to fall in love several times with the same person to have a good relationship.

Do you want to know what I have planned for today? Getting you arrested for stealing my heart is a priority for me. My sweetheart, I wish you a happy Valentine’s Day!

Valentine’s Day isn’t something I regularly observe, but when I do, I make an effort to put on a phony grin for the occasion.

Because I am so attractive, we create the most beautiful pair on the planet. Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone.

The best of luck to you today, Mr. Walker, as you wonder who sent you this Valentine’s Day card. Thank you for putting your heart and soul into your teaching for us!

It wasn’t a case of falling in love at first sight. It took a full five minutes to complete the task.

A single word cannot adequately describe love, and a single day cannot adequately commemorate love. As a result of this situation, I have no arrangements with you for this Valentine’s Day.

I wish you Valentine’s Day that you will cherish! So, candy, candy Skyler, have a wonderful Valentine’s Day!

Be my Valentine and I’ll guarantee you a chocolate fountain, although an imagined one. I hope you have a good time, and please accept my apologies for my financial inability. Enjoy yourself to the fullest.

Roses are red, and you are as well, and when you flush next to me, it makes me feel wonderful. Happy Valentine’s Day to you, my sweetie, since you are the highlight of every day!

I’ve been thinking about how to express my feelings for you for a long time. I wish I could have been there when they gave birth to you. I’m going to propose to you right away. Have a wonderful Valentine’s Day.

Love is similar to backache in that it is not shown on X-rays, but you are aware that it is present.

It seems like Valentine’s Day every day when I’m with you, which is why I don’t have anything special to give you today.

Ewe woolly managed to win my affections. And it’s pure pleasure for you, babe!

If you are feeling lonely today, just tell yourself that you felt the same way yesterday and that tomorrow will be no different either. Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone!

Dear Friend, I would like to wish you a very happy Valentine’s Day. I hope you have a good time with your girlfriend, as she will not be leaving you to follow your buddies to a night out party with their mates.

Valentine’s Day is a day for a youngster with an arrow to go about killing people. Please accept my apologies for not bringing you out; I don’t want you to become a victim as well. Whatever you do, have a hearty Valentine’s Day.

I had a lot of crushes on different boys, but you were the most attractive of all of them, in my opinion. So you are the luckiest guy in the world to have me sitting right beside you. Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone!

I’ve never encountered a situation in which a bicycle can stand on its own. Because it is two-tired, to be precise. I’ll be too exhausted to continue living my life without you. My life wishes you a happy Valentine’s Day. Let’s take it easy.

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Cupid, you’ve got a terrific shot there. Valentine, I’m in love with you!

What do you name the world’s tiniest Valentine? you might wonder. A Valen-tiny, to be precise.

Because I’m head over heels in love with you, I need to improve the strength of my glasses.

As a formal request on this Valentine’s Day, I ask that you please leave my thoughts since I can’t stop thinking about you.

All I want is to be friends with you. plus a smidgeon more. In addition, I adore you.

You don’t need flowers to make your home smell good, and you don’t need ornaments to make your home appear lovely. And then I realized that you don’t need a special day like Valentine’s Day to be appreciated!

My pals are some of the strangest and craziest individuals I’ve ever met, but I adore them. Everyone has a wonderful Valentine’s Day!

Every cow has your face on it, and I recognize it. Please shed a few pounds in my honor. Wishing you a happy Valentine’s Day.

You are the sun, which not only illuminates my days but also causes me to become sunburned. Happy Valentine’s Day from the warmth of the sun to the depths of the ocean!

Valentine, you’re the one I’ve chosen. Every single day of the week, Riley’s kind greetings

Let me congratulate you on putting together the nicest Valentine’s Day present for your closest buddy!

Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone. I can’t begin to comprehend how fortunate you are to be married to someone like me!

If you plan to be alone for the next two years, you should seriously consider dating someone else instead of yourself. Since you are one of a kind and there is no one else like you!

I adore you in the same way that a slacker adores his bed first thing in the morning. Like a monkey loves bananas, I want you more than anything else in the world, and I want you more than a fat lad wants chocolate bars.

Happy Valentine’s Day, my darling. I have fought everything in my life, but it appears that you are irresistible, because you are the only temptation I have in every aspect of my life. Let’s take advantage of the opportunity.

Before I met you, I was a hunk of fat, but since then, I’ve lost a significant amount of weight. You’re the most effective weight-loss therapy available. Let’s go inside and work on losing even more weight. Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone.

The first thing I say when someone asks me what the best thing about you is is “I don’t know.” I don’t want them to fall head over heels in love with you. Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone!

You can’t place a monetary value on true love. However, if you had the option, I’d hold off until it goes on sale.

Although money can’t buy love, it can buy a lot of it.

When you’re with me, don’t act too cool; you’ll come across as an idiot. Wishing you a happy Valentine’s Day.

Love is like a blanket. Even while it appears to keep you warm and safe for a short time, you will quickly find that it was an electric blanket and that someone else was in command of the switch!

Friendships last a lifetime, but girlfriends are only fleeting. Accept the reality of the situation, my buddy. Let’s spend this Valentine’s Day high on drugs and drunk as a lord to celebrate love and romance!

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