Funny Quotes And Sayings Top 100+ Funny Memes That Will Change Your Life with a laugh “Don’t you dare for one more second. Surround yourself with people who are not aware of the greatness that you are. If you’re going through hell, keep going.”
Best funny quotes about life “ Poor plants, save the plants, save the world. Every day, thousands of innocent plants are killed by vegetarians. Help end the violence. Eat bacon.” –Me
Awesome funny quotes with images “You can’t always control who walks into your life but you can decide which windows will fit into their body.” –Not me
Funny Quotes And Sayings
1. Star War Fanbase
2. Don’t eat
“A good rule to remember for life is that when it comes to plastic surgery and sushi, never be attracted by a bargain.”
“I’m not good at the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?”
—Chandler (Matthew Perry), Friends
“Here’s all you have to know about men and women: Women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.”
3. Oh My Gosssh…
4. Inspirational Anywhere
“When I’m in social situations, I always hold onto my glass. It makes me feel comfortable and secure and I don’t have to shake hands.”
—Larry (Larry David), Curb Your Enthusiasm
“As you get older, three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can’t remember the other two.”
—Sir Norman Wisdom
Stan Fields: “Describe your perfect date.”
Cheryl: “That’s a tough one. I’d have to say April Because it’s not too hot and not too cold. All you need is a light jacket.”
—Stan Fields (William Shatner) and Cheryl Frasier (Heather Burns), Miss Congeniality
5. Oh me to me…
6. Gon’t look Try to think like me…
Lucy: “There are just two things keeping me from dancing in that show.”
Fred: “Your feet?”
—Lucy (Lucille Ball) and Fred Mertz (William Frawley), I Love Lucy
Hilarious Quotes to Make You Laugh
“Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most never use it.”
Coach: “How’s a beer sound, Norm?”
Norm: “I don’t know, I usually finish before they get a word in.”
—Coach (Nicholas Colasanto) and Norm (George Wendt), Cheers
7. Oh Japanese Whisky
8. It is ok Look at me…
9. How long…
Usher: “Bride or groom?”
Wedding guest: “It should be perfectly obvious I’m neither!” —Four Weddings and a Funeral
“I saw a study that said speaking in front of a crowd is considered the number one fear of the average person. Number two was death. This means to the average person, if you have to be at a funeral, you would rather be in the casket than doing the eulogy.” —Jerry Seinfeld
Funny Quotes About Life
“If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the carpet, I wouldn’t be more surprised.” —Clark Griswold (Chevy Chase), National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation
10. Dude we put a bike on your Bike!
11. If I can do it, You can’t!
“I’m at a place in my life when errands are starting to count as going out.”
“That’s why New York is so great, though. Everyone you care about can despise you and you can still find a bagel so good, nothing else matters. Who needs love when you’ve got lox? They both stink, but only one tastes good.”
—Midge Maisel (Rachel Brosnahan), The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
“A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.”
12. My Watching me!
13. What You Look At Man!
14. Not a lie if you believe it!
Short Funny Quotes Guaranteed to Make You Laugh
15. Battleship my Cat what do you think?
16. Shut your?
17. Waiting patiently for dad to get upstairs.?
18. Keep sending them this shit?
19. Keep sending them this shit?
20. Keep sending them this shit to me?
21. Lego? Older I get…
“Instead of the mahi mahi, may I just get the one mahi because I’m not that hungry?”
—Shelley Darlingson (Anna Faris), The House Bunny
“Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer.”
Funny Quotes from Comedians
Francois: “Do you know what kind of a bomb it was?”
Clouseau: “The exploding kind.”
—Francois (André Maranne) and Inspector Clouseau (Peter Sellers), The Pink Panther Strikes Again
“My ability to turn good news into anxiety is rivaled only by my ability to turn anxiety into chin acne.”
—Tina Fey, Bossypants
22. How do you know you’re getting old?
23. Every God Dam Time?
“I grew up with six brothers. That’s how I learned to dance: waiting for the bathroom.”
“I’m not good at the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?” —Chandler (Matthew Perry), Friends.
Funny Quotes For Friends
“Having those weird conversations with your friend and thinking, if anyone heard us, we’d be put in a mental hospital.” —Unknown.
“We’ve been friends for so long I can’t remember which one of us is the bad influence.” —Unknown.
“Best Friends. They know how crazy you are and still choose to be seen with you in public.” —Unknown
“Best friend: the one that you can be mad at only for a short period of time because you have important stuff to tell them.” —Unknown
“If you think your boss is stupid, remember: you wouldn’t have a job if he was any smarter.” — John Gotti.
“Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?” — Edgar Bergen
“The only thing that ever sat its way to success was a hen.” — Sarah Brown
“If we’re going to pay this much for crab, it better sing and dance and introduce us to the Little Mermaid.”
—Claire Foster (Tina Fey), Date Night
“I prefer not to think before speaking. I like being as surprised as everyone else by what comes out of my mouth.”
“There is one word that describes people that don’t like me: Irrelevant.”
“Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?”
“I remember it like it was yesterday. Of course, I don’t really remember yesterday all that well.”
—Dory (Ellen DeGeneres), Finding Dory
“I don’t have to take this abuse from you; I’ve got hundreds of people dying to abuse me.”
—Dr. Peter Venkman (Bill Murray), Ghostbusters
Quotes to Make You Laugh
“Here’s some advice: At a job interview, tell them you’re willing to give percent. Unless the job is a statistician.”
“Does it disturb anyone else that ‘The Los Angeles Angels’ baseball team translates directly to ‘The The Angels Angels’?”
—Neil DeGrasse Tyson
“I never forget a face—but in your case, I’ll be glad to make an exception.”
“Here’s something to think about: How come you never see a headline like ‘Psychic Wins Lottery’?”
Harry: “No, it’s a cardigan. But thanks for noticing.”
—Harry Dunne (Jeff Daniels), Dumb and Dumber
“There are only three ages for women in Hollywood: babe, district attorney and Driving Miss Daisy.”
—Elise (Goldie Hawn), The First Wives Club
“There’s nothing simpler than avoiding people you don’t like. Avoiding one’s friends, that’s the real test.”
—Dowager Countess Violet Crawley (Maggie Smith), Downton Abbey
“If I’m not back in five minutes, just wait longer.”
—Ace Ventura (Jim Carrey), Ace Ventura: Pet Detective
“The only thing that separates us from the animals is our ability to accessorize.”
—Clairee Belcher (Olivia Dukakis), Steel Magnolias
“My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far I’ve finished two bags of M&Ms and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.”
“Never do anything out of hunger. Not even eating.”
—Frank Semyon (Vince Vaughn), True Detective
“What do you mean, he doesn’t eat no meat? That’s okay, that’s okay. I make lamb.”
—Aunt Voula (Andrea Martin), My Big Fat Greek Wedding
“You know you’re getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you’re down there.”
“Nobody ever wrote down a plan to be broke, fat lazy, or stupid. Those things are what happen when you didn’t have a plan.” – Larry Winget
“The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary.” – Vince Lombardi
“I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.” —Phyllis Diller
“Never follow anyone else’s path. Unless you’re in the woods and you’re lost, and you see a path. Then, by all means, follow that path.”—Ellen DeGeneres.
“Insomnia sharpens your math skills because you spend all night calculating how much sleep you’ll get if you’re able to ‘fall asleep right now.”—Anonymous.
“I used to sell furniture for a living. The trouble was, it was my own.”—Les Dawson.
“I’m sick of following my dreams, man. I’m just going to ask where they’re going and hook up with ’em later.” —Mitch Hedberg.
“To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people!”
—Wanda (Jamie Lee Curtis), A Fish Called Wanda
What are some cool quotes?
- Let your soul stand cool and composed before a million universes.
- Rather be dead than cool.
- Be still and cool in thine own mind and spirit.
- Nothing is cooler and more attractive than a big comeback, and that’ll be me.
- I’m a mirror.
- Keep a cool head and maintain a low profile.
- I can take it.
Getting oneself motivated can be difficult, but adding a sense of humor to the process can make it feel less scary and more doable, which is a huge step in the right direction. Discovering the lighter side of life may serve as a source of inspiration that propels one to achieve fantastic things of any magnitude. This is because the roller coaster journey that is life is never without its ups and downs.
Consider referring back to these statements whenever you find yourself in a sticky situation. They may be able to cheer you up and give you the additional push you require at times when you are feeling depressed. When life knocks you down, these are the things that will help you get back up and keep moving forward.
What are famous sayings?
The Most Famous Quotes about funny
- “Fortune favors the bold.”
- “I think, therefore I am.”
- “Time is money.”
- “I came, I saw, I conquered.”
- “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.”
Quotes that will make you laugh about work and the office: From the cubicle to the water cooler, office life impacts each person in a unique way. Nevertheless, each of these amusing statements illustrates the same topic in its own unique way. Not only are these sayings really hilarious, but they also have a great deal of relevance to a large number of different people.
You could write it to yourself if you feel like you need a little pick-me-up, or you could email it to a coworker for a good laugh if you need a break from the monotony of your daily routine. The discussions span from how to achieve success to the challenges of day-to-day life. Keep in mind that everyone will experience challenging times at some point in their lives, but that doesn’t mean you can’t go through them with a smile on your face if you remember some wise words.
What are some fun quotes?
- Just Have Fun Quotes And Sayings
- “People rarely succeed unless they have fun in what they are doing.” -Dale Carnegie.
- “Even though you’re growing up, you should never stop having fun.”
- “Reclaim your curiosity, your sense of adventure, and have some fun.
Quotes About Best Friends Being Funny: There is no one quite like a best friend. They are the people you should go to first if you are in need of a good laugh. This is due to the fact that they have been there for you through the good times and the bad times.
On the days on which you want to remind them of your appreciation or if you just need to inspire them to grin, these quotations will certainly do the trick to accomplish any of those aims, and they will do so in the most effective manner possible. They are hilarious and relevant, and they can be used in a wide variety of scenarios, despite the fact that the two of you have known each other for a different amount of time.
Here are some funny words to help remind you that in order to get what you want in life, you often have to go beyond what you funny thought you were…
For the best funny sayings, photos & images? Love These pictures can be used on Facebook, Tumblr, Pinterest, Twitter, and others. 100 funny quotes with images of Positive Energy for your life. Best Funny Pictures (100 Pics) fun pics, funnies, funny, funny memes, funny pics, Funny Pictures, humor, images, meme, memes, pics. Whether it’s a play on words, a funny observation about everyday things, or old witty sayings, comedy has a way of making us realize we’re all going through the same stuff in this crazy life. Tyr our FUNNY QUOTES & SAYINGS ideas.
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